In search of Adam

the long version

"Left abandoned by the suicide of her mother and betrayed by her closest family, six-year-old Jude Williams’ childhood is fractured by the horror and experience of sexual abuse. Trapped within the limitations of her language and understanding, and unwitting party to a shocking family secret, Jude becomes the consequence of her mother’s tragedy. As she moves through the 1980s, Jude’s life is buffeted by choice and destiny and she collects experiences that layer her personal tragedy and plunge her into the darkest of worlds. The discovery of her mother’s diary five years after her death reveals a brother she never knew – Adam. Dead before Jude was even conceived, malicious whispers within the family point accusatory fingers at Jude’s mother, Sarah. Sarah’s diary starkly reveals a woman battling with post-natal depression, sinking herself into an anesthetizing blanket of alcohol and failing as a mother and wife. Jude’s life is once again thrown into sharp relief. Externalising her internal pain with a series of attacks on her own body, Jude distances herself further and further from the few who may actually be able to help her. Powerful and haunting Jude’s heartbreaking story is truly unforgettable as the very foundations of her life continue to crumble, leading her to a dreadful but inevitable conclusion." --www.carolinesmailes.co.uk/