Social blunders

the long version

Sam Callahan was old enough to know better. Old enough to have sidestepped the trap that was Wanda, his now-wandering wife: Wanda of the black braids and ferocious tongue who's run off with his Datsun 240Z, his baseball card collection, and the pool boy - the kid with "Born to Loose" (sic) tattooed across his left shoulder blade. Sam's all-knowing daughter, Shannon, has his problem pegged: "Heartbreak to you is like garlic to a cook," she tells him, not without some sympathy. And it's a fact: Sam does tend to wallow in romantic angst. But Wanda is one wallow too many. Hoping to jolt Sam from his vapors and knowing well how her father broods on his legendary misconception (a night of drunken debauch, an anonymous inseminator), Shannon digs up the names and addresses of all his possible dads. Then, handing over the list, she tells Sam to get on with his life. Soon Sam is banging on doors and interrupting lives in hot pursuit of his missing daddy. It isn't long before he has five families in an uproar of mistaken identity and sexual shenanigans. And it isn't a whole lot longer still before Sam finds himself running for his life.