Lanky spoken here

the long version

This is your survival guide in the linguistic minefield that is 'Lanky' - an indispensable phrase book for the 'foreign' visitor as he attempts to communicate in deepest Lancashire. * Would you like it if you were the recipient of a Wigan kiss? * Should you go to a Lanky dinner at lunchtime or a tea at dinnertime? * If someone refers to you as an old stocking top, what should your attitude be? * What are the real identities of Gracie Chips and Willy Eckerslike? * Why does a Lanky Chauvinist Pig always carry two short planks under his arm? If the answers to these questions flummox you and give you yedwarch, then you NEED Lanky Spoken Here! ** With fifteen hilarious cartoons by Bill Tidy! Dave Dutton is a succesful comedy scriptwriter and has written for television stars like Ronnie Corbett, Dick Emery, Les Dawson, The Two Ronnies and Ken Dodd, among others. He is also the co-author of the definitive guide to sandwich making - The Ken Dodd Butty Book.