The Official Alien Abductee's Handbook

A humorous look at how to recover from alien abductions "without hypnotherapy, crystals or CIA surveillance." Lessons in this informative, irreverent, and frightening guide to close encounters of the third degree include: * How to dis an alien * What to tell your doctor * How to speak with plain-clothes government investigators * How to appear on talk shows * How to tell your significant other The funniest book I've read since the Warren Report." -- Robert Anton Wilson, futurist and author of the Illuminatus! trilogy. "Joe Tripician has achieved the impossible: a truly funny book on alien abductions." -- Dr. John C. Lilly, neurophysiologist, and inspiration for the films Day of the Dolphin and Altered States "Nothing in this book is real according to the known laws of physics, but it is very funny." -- Dr. Michio Kaku, theoretical physicist, and author of Hyperspace